Monday, August 12, 2013

Our Little Treasure in Heaven, Mercy Grace

"...lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal." (Matthew 6:20 ESV)

My dear husband and I now have a precious little treasure waiting for us in Heaven. 
On Wednesday, August 7th, we went in for my regular 17-week prenatal checkup to see how the baby was doing, and to our shock and extreme grief, found no heartbeat or sign of life in our little unborn child. 
After spending Thursday night in the hospital, I was induced early in the morning on Friday. 

At 4:03pm on Friday, August 9th, our precious Mercy Grace Dreher was delivered. She was almost 7 inches long, and weighed 2.6 ounces.
The doctors were quite sure that the cause of death was something called amniotic band syndrome. There were threads of tissue around her little hands and umbilical cord. It is a freak occurrence, and not caused by anything I did or didn't do, and can't really be prevented or predicted.
Nate and I were able to hold her for awhile, and then a nurse took pictures of us with her. 
She was so perfect. Her little toes and fingers had the cutest little nails on them. Her tiny mouth was open a bit, and I believe we could see her little tongue. We could see her little eyes beneath her transparent lids. She had long little arms and legs. She was completely there. All she needed was more time to grow. 

But God saw fit to take her home, instead of giving her that time. We will never understand why God chose to take our first child from us. Nate and I miss our little daughter tremendously. We mourn that she will never call us "mommy" or "daddy", never give us hugs or kisses, never sing or dance for us; and we can never read to her, teach her things, hold her close, cover her with kisses, go on walks with her, or play with her...

But we do know, and rejoice in the fact, that she will never know suffering. Mercy will never see the sin of the world. Never know evil. Never know anything that plagues us here on earth. She is now joyously praising her Creator and dancing at Jesus' feet. We look forward to meeting her when we join her in Heaven someday. Our precious little treasure, Mercy Grace Dreher.

Mercy was wrapped in this little blanket and robe, which made her look even tinier and more precious. 

Thursday, April 25, 2013

Orchids, Crosses, and Love

A knock sounded at the front door. Quite certain it was my husband arriving home from work, I peeked through the peephole, only to see an empty hallway. Curious, I slowly opened the door, and to my surprise, upon the welcome mat I found a beautiful white orchid plant waiting for me. And quietly hiding around the corner was my dear Nate. He knew I had a somewhat rough, emotional morning that day, and kindly blessed me with a visual reminder of his love and care. Something beautiful that I can gaze upon while he's gone at work, and be reminded of all that he does for me.

It's much like looking at a small copper cross that we have hanging on our wall. It serves to remind me of the beautiful work that Jesus, through His love, did for me. Although His suffering and death were anything but beautiful, the result is. I am now a clean, spotless daughter of God, because Jesus bore the wrath of God that my sins deserved. But that wasn't all; Jesus continues to give me wonderful gifts in addition to His salvation: forgiveness, love for others, strength, family, friends, health...the list goes on!
What an amazing thing! And what an incredible gift, that God has also given me a husband to demonstrate to me, in the finite ways that he is able, the love and care of my Savior!

What?? If you've been following my blog at all(which is difficult to do, as I've posted less than a dozen times in the last year), you are probably wondering what happened! In my last post, I wrote about desiring a husband, and now I suddenly have one?? Well, that's just another post for another day... :)